My father's will
by Chavakiah
Summary: ON HOLD! After the end of the war Legolas returns home and gets into an emotional turmoil between duty and freedom as he realises that his father has changed a lot during the last few years, Aragorn tries to help both as a friend and as the king of Gondor
1. Peace whispers softly

**Title:** My father's will

**Disclaimer: **I do not own them and no monetary profit is being made from this fanfic.

**Summary: **After the end of the war Legolas returns home and gets into an emotional turmoil between duty and freedom as he realises that his father has changed a lot during the last few years, Aragorn tries to help both as a friend and as the king of Gondor)

**Warning:** A lot of blood in later chapters, maybe some Character Death, an unbelievable peck of troubles AND a lot of depression.

**A/N:** **Well, hello guys! This is my first story with continuation and I desperately hope that you'll like the plot as I've finished writing the last chapter yesterday (and therefore can't do anything about it if not lol).**

**Buuut.. Do you know what that means? Well? Do you?? Right!! You won't have to wait long for me to write each chapter as they are already finished! Yay! **

**Umm.. well, there's just one snag.. I've written it in my native tongue first and then translated it, so there's a possibility that there will be still some grammar/spelling mistakes in it. Of course I tried my very best to find and correct them, but I discovered that translating a story is quite catchier than writing it in English in the first place! Please don't strangle me.. Oo **

**Well, enough of this babble.. and on with the story. Enjoy!!**

cococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococ

* * *

                      

**1. Peace whispers softly**

cococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococ

Was it a dream?

Finally; finally the war was over and the Lord of darkness had been defeated. Sauron was dead; forever gone. Their world was finally safe.

Of course there still would be enough battles against prowling Orcs, but who cared about that at the moment? After all, they just went through one of the hardest battles in history and everyone craved desperately to finally celebrate.

So many people had fallen; too many. There was nobody who hadn't at least lost a friend or a relative.

And so the ongoing feast was a top priority to the freshly crowned king. Everyone should be able to relax and enjoy the thought of the oncoming peace.

Whether human, hobbit, dwarf or elf, everyone in the glorious hall was found laughing and drinking. A circumstance they were honestly worthy of.

How long had he waited to catch sight of such a view? A view of complete satisfaction, unclouded by any kind of sorrow. It was all the more joyful as every different race was celebrating together without wasting a thought on whether they were humans, hobbits or elves. Today everyone was your friend; on such a day everyone was a brother.

Yes, he had never been able to imagine such an carefree interaction; but he had always hoped that it would come. He also had hope that Gondor would be finally peaceful and dignified again.

Yes, hope has always been the most precious thing in life. Hope was driving the humans ahead in their intention and it had gotten them _so far_: The dark powers would remain forever banned.

Aragorn smiled warmly as his future wife leaned against his shoulder and looked at him with sparkling eyes. "Is this how you've always imagined it to be, _meleth_? Say, does it give you the same pleasure as it is giving to me?" she asked then with a soft voice.

His hand stroked over her velvet darkbrown hair. „No, it's a lot more beautiful than I could have ever imagined. Well, no wonder, 'cause reality is so much better than any imagination. Here I sit on Gondor's throne in the hall of my palace, in the city of my forefathers with the most beautiful woman of middle-earth at my side, while everyone's heart is filled with hope and peace", he said to his wife with a gentle smile.

Arwen gave him a smile of her own as he pressed a kiss onto her slender hand, which he held firmly in his own in the intention to not release it that easily again as a spark in his eyes flared up.

"And still sadness is surrounding you", she observed, "What is it that saddens you, Estel?"

The king sighed sorrowfully. "Nine people decamped from Rivendell at the day I left you behind, my love, and only eight can duly celebrate the peace we desired for so long. I lost a friend on the battlefield, one that always placed his services loyally in the white city and who would have given his life to see his hometown flourish again." Aragorn's voice became sad, his voice growing heavier with every word.

"And given he had his life indeed, as although he deserved this view as well as the others, he isn't between you and me. This day would have been one of great joy for him ."

The Eveningstar squeezed her love's hand in sympathy. "You speak of Boromir, don't you?" she asked and at his nod she continued, "well, don't you see, meleth, that he doesn't need your compassion? I'm sure he celebrates our victory wherever he is now."

Aragorn let another deep sigh go and once again he noticed how right his beloved was. Such bright lore was even heard by the ears of the fallen ones. Boromir would certainly celebrate with them and be it that he was invisible, but this day lured even the souls of their fallen comrades in the realm of the living.

At the sparkle of contentment in the human's eyes she decided to take the chance and guide him further into the emotional state of sweet unconcern. "Let go of your cheerless thoughts" , whispered the delicate elven maid, "You are also worthy of the feast as you were courageously fighting side by side with the persons in this hall as well. Why don't you go and join your friends for a while? I suppose, they are travelling back into their homeland tomorrow after all."

Grey eyes shifted to stare at the female elf. "But-", Aragorn immediately started to protest, but was interrupted quite as quickly. "No _but_, beloved. We will have enough time together as we will celebrating our marriage soon and I won't believe that you don't have the wish to revel this occasion with your friends. Look at Frodo and the others, even the ones that would have sufficient cause to become desperate after such traumatic experiences get carried away. Go and get to know them in times without desperation, grief and graveness."

Well, here spoke the future queen of Gondor and there was no other option than to obey. She would probably do all the talking in their wedlock as well as in political affairs.

The thought of this brought a gentle smile to his lips and he gave her soft kiss on her flawless forehead once again before he rose. Then he blended in between the people to grace his loyal long-run-fellows with a visit.

      

* * *

 cococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococ

(Legolas)

              

A wave of felicity washed over my heart as I sat at the table and drank wine between all the revellers. From miles around I heard laughter and I quickly joined in with my own as the impulse to celebrate with them was just too great.

True, the sound level in the hall was a bit too high for my sensitive elven ears and I probably would have a dreadful headache later, (whereas the effect of the wine wouldn't be beneficial) but for once I didn't care about rationality, which I kept so strictly in other respects.

I wouldn't have a cogent reason to extensive laughter all too soon again for I would ride back to Mirkwood tomorrow; back home.

Without a question I loved my home more than everything else, but I would still miss celebrating so casually.

I would miss the hobbits with their extensive songs for drunks and their reckless dancing on the tables, whereat not only one goblet of wine was sent to the floor. But today nobody could find enough reason to let new anger sprout.

I would miss Gandalf with his passion for the tobacco from our little friends as he divulged one of his many stories while smoking his pipe.

I would miss the humans that were able to celebrate so untroubled and rompish while they enjoyed every hour with another partner. Human occasions were so different from the ones of my own kind. Well, I had already gotten an insight in Rohan but I was amazed on and off again.

I wondered how it would be to amuse himself every night with another lover. For me it would probably feel like I changed lovers every second, as elves had a quite different sense of time.

My gaze fell upon the royal couple of Gondor. I granted Aragorn his happiness and still I felt melancholic at the thought to leave him as we have fought side by side for a very long time.

Last but not least I would miss the dwarf sitting next to me, who was emptying his jar of wine, although I wasn't able to count how many he had drank already.

Among my people there was none that had contracted a friendship such as I had. But although the dwarfs and the elves converged a little bit closer thanks to Gimli, my folk still clung firmly to the belief that jewels were the only thing dwarfs were interested in.

I for my part had accustomed to Gimlis' gruffy comments and playful mocking as I knew that he enjoyed annoying me. He took my responses just as well, which he joyfully tried to counter again.

We both knew that a friendship between dwarves and elves wasn't impossible, when the elf let go of his haughtiness and the dwarf of his prejudice.

At this moment he raised a freshly filled jar and waited for me to join him again. I didn't hesitate long and shared his delight as I let a gulp of the bitter wine flow into my mouth while Gimli already started speaking again.

Normally I didn't emphasise the wine of the humans, because it wasn't as sweet and covetable for me like the one at home, but I drank it nevertheless. After all it would be the last time for a long period that I would taste it on my tongue as I usually preferred to avoid alcohol anyway.

Well, drinking this stuff was truthfully a competition that I would allow Gimli to win as he drank the bitter wine like water while I mostly sipped at it hesitatingly to preserve my sensitive taste buds.

Unfortunately all elves except Arwen and I left shortly after the coronation as they didn't enjoy celebrating like humans. Though in the turmoil between humans, I wished secretly for some people of my own kind with whom I could have changed a few words.

Beyond doubt, the stories of my friends were exciting and amusing, but I had heard them too often already and I longed for the soft sound of my mother tongue that allowed me to raise into another level of existence.

The chiselled words and the hard acerb articulation of Westron confused me after a long time; disturbed me in keeping my mind clear; rumbling around in my head like a loud rockfall.

For a moment I allowed myself to think of Lothlorien, whose silence was only emphasised by the soft singing of elves. Haldir of Lorien had been very lucky indeed to have such a beautiful home and I could understand far too well why he had defended it with his life.

My daydream was interrupted abruptly as Gimli ellbowed me with a smirk, looking at me expectantly. "It was just like that, wasn't it, Legolas?!"

"Forgive me, my friend, I didn't listen." It would have been fittingly to just stutter an affirmation, but I rather chose to be honest and accepted the ignominy to be mocked by the dwarf as I knew that he enjoyed it so much.

My answer transferred him into even greater amusement and he replied something about elves and their sharp ears. I offered only a weak smile; clearly feeling the increasing pain in my head now and the enormous deficit of oxygen in the hall.

"Excuse me for a moment" , I murmured softly and without waiting for response I departed from the table, knowing that nobody had noticed anyway. Well, I could have left without saying anything, but I thought that my etiquette demanded it.

On my way to the ample stone-terrace I was jostled by a few blithe guests and I even thought I had detected two lovers in a dark corner, but I didn't want to aim my sharp sight at them more accurately.

As soon as I was outside I took a deep breath and filled my lungs with fresh air. Out here there was almost nothing to smell of the alcohol, food, sweat and the wads of smoke that hung all-over the hall.

The only smell was the one of upcoming rain and grasses that the wind brought to me. I massaged my temples gently to clear my head as fast as possible so that I could join the feast again.

But too beautiful was the sight of the stars in the barely clouded sky so that I couldn't help but staring up at it for a while.

No matter in which country you resided, the sky was the only thing that was the same everywhere. The sunrises and sundowns, the bright blue on hot days or the deep black of the night only broken by moonlight and thousands and thousands of stars. How long had I disallowed myself the time to just look at the sky?

I felt inner calm that dispersed and engrossed my heart while my eyes slowly wandered to the small flares of the houses. This sight remembered me quite a lot of Mirkwood and I asked myself, how it will be to return home after all these years.

Probably there will have changed only minor things, but that would suit me only too well as I loved it just the way it was.

So I let my thoughts get carried away as I remembered the beautiful depths of the wood and I allowed myself to withdraw from the feast a little longer..

 

* * *

cococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococ                  

After having successfully avoided the fifth goblet of wine that the hobbits sent in every direction in their dance and after Gandalf had to tell his story for the third time from the beginning, as again and again new listeners joined, Aragorn headed for the table with the fewest occupants but the most pitchers.

Smirking he dropped down on the free place next to the stout dwarf and picked up the last shreds of words of the report about an elimination of orcs,that the axe-bearer was divulging so bounteously.

"Now, Gimli", he said cheerfully, "what do you think of our wine?"

A grin spread on the dwarfs face. "Count the empty goblets, my friend and you will have your answer!" Gloin's son laughed and took instantly yet another big gulp of the pitcher to punctuate his response.

Aragorn just nodded in satisfaction, glad that his friend relished the wine. "Say, master of wine, where's Legolas? I was sure that I've seen him sitting here with you at this table just a moment ago."

The dwarf didn't even look at Aragorn as he answered while drinking from his goblet. "Your eyes didn't betray you, but the touchy elf babbled something about going outside. The goblet of wine he sipped at for a couple of hours was probably too much for him!!" This time the king let himself be carried away to laugh with the dwarf.

When the laughter subsided again, he patted the stout beings' shoulder. "I hope you don't mind that I'm going to look after the elf; seeing if he is well. I'll return to you again afterwards, Gimli." The dwarf waved him off, starting to tell yet another story and Aragorn rose with a smile.

He instantly caught sight of his slender-framed friend as he stepped out onto the terrace. His pale-blond hair waved in the strong wind of the night while his sapphire blue eyes stared afield aimlessly.

The king carefully stepped forward, but the sharp senses of his elven friend couldn't be deceived by any living creature as Legolas immediately turned around with a soft smile. Supposable that it had also been those fine elvish senses that had driven him outside.

The former Dunedain halted directly next to his friend although said one would have been able to hear his whispered words from miles afar. "It's a tepid night."

The elf didn't move an inch; staring into the night like a statue carved out of marble. "Rain is coming soon", he then murmured quietly, "I can smell it in the wind. It's coming to wash away the filth of the orcs."

Aragorn took a deep breath and sighed. "I wish the wind would tell me just as much, but today my mind is clouded by wine. Tell me my friend, what is keeping you out here instead of the hall accompanying us? And don't answer me you were lingering outside because you had to receive the message of the wind."

Aragorn offered a smile and Legolas faintly returned it.

"I'm thinking of home" , the elf returned after a second. Aragorn looked at him curiously. "Do you miss it?"

Unconsciously the man balled his hands into tight fists as he waited for an answer as he didn't like to part from his friend.

There was a sigh.

"More than ever", Legolas quietly responded, "but even so I don't want to miss this place too."

Aragorn knew that this wasn't easy for his friend. To return back home while your best friend stayed behind was never an easy task.

"Well, it had been long since you last entered your woods, I'm able to understand your nostalgia and I would be gladly doing everything to ease it, but I had to admit that the thought of you leaving tomorrow is saddening me nevertheless."

The king gently squeezed the shoulder of his elven friend; trying to give him comfort as well as himself.

Legolas smiled in return as he looked at the human. "You know, it isn't just the wood that I miss, I also long for being reunited with the ones living within it. I wish my father would have come today or at least a few of his delegates, but I know very well that he couldn't just leave Mirkwood."

Aragorn examined the prince from the side, noticing for the first time, that he had never before spoken about his wishes. "Are there others waiting for you as well? Besides of your father, of course", he asked innocently, hoping to learn a little bit more about his friend.

The elf stepped forward to the balustrade to rest his arms on it and smiled softly. "No female if this is what you want to know, but my younger brother, Lairion, is. I think he's waiting even more impatiently for my return than every other person throughout Mirkwood", Legolas responded amused and shared a silent look with his human friend.

Then they both turned to look at the sky again.

"Well", Aragorn said, "he will be feeling great joy and pride then. After all his brother had played a important part in bringing peace to Middle-earth."

The pale being next to him just shook his head with a smile on his lips. "Ai, Estel! If everyone praised me like you do, I would be truly considering not to ride home."

Aragorn stared at him in mock-horror. "What's that supposed to mean? As a prince you should be already accustomed to this! Say, how comes that someone in your position isn't comfortable with glory?"

Legolas shook his head once again. "Do you really expect an answer to that question? You know very well that I do not attach importance to my status. That's also the reason why I travelled to Rivendell and attended the council against the will of my father."

The human now stared at his friend in true shock. "Don't tell me, that you have fought with us in this war all these years **without** permission?!"

"My king.." Legolas bowed slightly with an impish smile on his lips, "of course I wouldn't have dared to do such a thing."

Aragorns muscles relaxed again although he hadn't known, that they had even tensed, but the thought that the elf could have fallen and on top of everything would have been gone from his homeland without being allowed to, had frightened him.

"Well?" he asked then as the elf didn't seem to continue and earned himself a sigh from the fair being next to him.

"Well, as Gollum escaped I wanted to confess it to you myself, but my father was against it. I however refused to simply send someone else to Rivendell. After all the poor elf would have vouched for me although he had nothing to do with it."

The king of Gondor rolled his eyes. "You're so fussy and duteous that it hurts, do you know that?"

Legolas just grinned and stared into the darkness of the night again. "My father told me the same, but he added 'pig-headed' to it", he informed Aragorn.

"He was fuming as I didn't give an inch that the news about Gollum's escape would be brought by myself. My decision was made and although my father could just have banned me from going as my king, he still knew me well enough that he couldn't dissuade me, and so I left."

Aragorn thought the earth had begun to spin around him as a sudden dizziness surrounded him. The words of his friends hit him like a punch in the face.

Legolas had fought numerous battles with him and he had risked his life many times, but his own father, the mighty king Thranduil of Mirkwood hadn't even had a clue that his son had gone into war?!

And it wasn't just any war, no! It was the war with the one ring involved!

By the Valar, what if Legolas had died? How would his father have received the message that his oldest son was dead? How would he have reacted if the crownprince had fallen in a battle that Thranduil hadn't even known Legolas had been fighting it?

The elf instantly laid a supporting arm around the shoulders of his companion as he noticed how pale said one had grown and silver-grey eyes met saphirblue.

"Legolas.. does that mean, that your father doesn't even know you are still _alive_..?" The elf just frowned at him, not knowing what he should make of this question.

"You know me well enough, Estel. Would you believe me dead?"

Aragorn lifted his hands in placation. "Don't get me wrong, mellon-nin, your skills are incredible, but just consider how often you hazarded your life for that of another! We both know that there had been critical situations. However, it doesn't count what _I _think. He's your father, Legolas, and his sorrow must be unimaginable!!"

"You don't know my father, then", replied the elf stiffly and averted his eyes in defiance. The gondorian king sighed deeply, once again despairing on the elves stubborness.

After a while he grasped the elf's shoulders; waiting until said one was ready to meet his gaze.

"It's indeed too late to reverse it", the human stated softly, "but I for my part don't approve what you have done. You should apologise to him as soon as you come home as your father loves you for sure."

Something indefinable flared up in Legolas' eyes, but before Aragorn was able to discern what it was his friend turned away again.

"I did my duty, there's no need for an apology. He was not able to understand this it at that time and he still won't be able to do so now. "

With a sigh Aragorn came to terms with the realisation that he was banging his head against a brick wall. It was useless to argue with Legolas when he was like that and so he kept silent and they both examined the starry sky once again .

End first chapter

**tbc..**

cococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococococ

**A/N: ****Soooooooo what do you think? Useful or awful? Well, I know that this chapter hasn't much action, but I promise it will get more exciting soon! My personal plot-bunny has just decided that we should give you some break at first and let you adjust to my confusing, obscure writing-style. By the way.. did I mention that someone will be dying soon? hehe Namarië!**


	2. Home calls



**Disclaimer: **Still not mine. (sigh)

**Warning:** A lot of blood in later chapters, maybe some Character Death, an unbelievable peck of troubles AND a lot of depression.

**A/N:** **A biiiiiiiiiiig thank you to all my reviewers! You really made my day! :-) I almost couldn't believe it; your reviews had been sooo nice and kind and funny and.. and..- well, they were just simply amazing ! Actually I hadn't expected to get reviews at all! Well, to be honest.. as I was correcting chapter two and three yesterday I was somehow a little bit unhappy about them, but it's probably the best to let you guys decide. :-)**

**I'm just warning you once again: this story contains a lot of emotions and maybe still some grammar/spelling mistakes I haven't been able to find as well. :-)**

**Kimsa Ki-Lurria:** Oh, thank you **very** much for your **kind and long**review and for sticking to my stories! :-) Weeell, unfortunately my plot-bunny has developed quite a bad habit of killing characters, but don't worry as you won't need a tissue at the first 'death'. :-) Maybe you will need it a little later though. Oh and please hold on for a little while longer.. it will get more interesting soon. I promiiiiiiiiiise.. :-)

**Nessa Leralonde:**Thank you sooo much for **all** of your previous reviews to my stories! :-) I'm happy that you like my writing-style since I was quite uncertain about it. I'll try keeping up good work; hoping that I won't disappoint you later on. :-)

Oh, about your offer: That would be wonderful!! I would **very**appreciate your help in pointing out my mistakes. (I'm sorry that I hadn't been able to find them at the first place.) Ummm.. maybe you can also tell me how a chapter can be edited? (blushes) I still haven't quite figured out how to use properly.. but I'll do my best. So umm.. well, thank you once again. :-)

Umm.. by the way.. is it just me, or did it catch your eye as well that I can't stop making emoticons? :-) Oh my god I'm addicted to smiles!! **lol**

**Well, on with the story. Enjoy!**

               

* * *

       

**2. Home calls**

* * *

The sun already stood high on the horizon as Elessar hurried through the stony hallways of the palace, his steps energetic as he headed for the large gate.

The cleaning efforts were at maximum progress with a lot of servants running from left to right, therefore it was difficult to find his friends that were going to depart today.

He ran a hand through his dark-brown hair; the headache from the lack of sleep and a great deal of too much alcohol still present.

They had danced, laughed and drank into the wee hours of morning and it seemed that the hobbits have been the only one that had rested this night.

These little men were truly astonishing. First they celebrated in such a cheerful way and then they were even able to sleep through the loud noise of other people.

Aragorn himself, had spent the rest of the night with Gimli and Legolas until Arwen softly but resolutely commanded him into their rooms.

That's the reason why he overslept almost the whole forenoon and only saw the light of the incomplete day as Arwen woke him to bid their friends farewell.

Unfortunately he had already missed the departure of his halfling-friends that had already left at dawn to reach the distant shire as fast as possible. Probably they had been just too eager to celebrate again.

Although it wasn't quite appropriate for a king to hurry in such a way, he headed towards the courtyard double quick, but as he finally reached his destination, he had to realise with disappointment that two horses with stuffed bags were already poised for departure.

An old man clad in spotless white made his way through the crowd with amazing calm while people stared at him in awe; whispering in excitement.

Aragorn offered the white wizard a soft smile that said one answered with one of his own.

Gandalfs' grip on his staff loosened a bit as he met up with the human; both feeling sorry of the oncoming departure.

"Did you enjoy your walk through the city?" the king of Gondor asked then, just to break the heavy silence.

"Well, yes I did" , Gandalf said with a smile, "Minas Tirith truly is a wonderful city and I'm sure under your reign it will be much better. I couldn't help visiting the library once again, don't dare neglecting it, you hear me ranger?!"

A grin spread on the human's face as he stared at the warning index-finger shoved in his face. "No, my friend. I promise I'll do my best to keep it whole and straight."

The wizard laid a hand on Aragorns' shoulder, squeezing it softly and for a moment they just looked at each other, silently exchanging their best wishes. "I know you will. I'm looking forward to visiting the library again next time."

Then he mounted the white horse he used to ride, suddenly peering around the courtyard. "Well and where on earth are my two _fearless_ companions now?!"

Gandalf cursed a few times under his breath, ignoring the wide grin spreading further on Aragorns' face.

"You hardly turn your back on them and the blasted elf and this unbelievingly stubborn dwarf are being swallowed by the earth! Gimli!!" he bellowed then.

Suddenly there was some loud, disgruntled murmuring to be heard and a very sour-looking dwarf stomped out of the stables; trying to get rid of some straw sticking to his clothes.

After him followed his fair elven companion who sheathed his dagger while laughing brightly.

Gimli's face was beet-red from anger as he turned around to his friend and waved his index-finger at him.

"Listen to me, _elf_! I'll tell you once again!! Dwarves have precious little relation to horses, we are quite happy on our own two feet! Nobody can trust those malicious beasts!"

"Well, I didn't know. You have a problem with horses?" Legolas innocent smile made Gimli even angrier and he turned with a huff.

"Come on, Gimli. Didn't you say you hate being so slow?!"

The dwarf would have gotten even redder if he hadn't been crimson already. With a comical snort he turned around again, tapping his finger against the belt of the elf in threat as he wasn't able to reach up to his chest.

"Spare me your stupid commentaries, will you?! **I** don't mind travelling on foot! Well, **I** also don't care if **you** will have to be waiting for ' _poor_, _slow me'_ then!! At least if we didn't have to ride I wouldn't have all the straw in my beard!! Well?! Help me you blasted pointy-eared being!!"

Legolas burst into laughter once again, a light flush reddening his usually pale cheeks, but he helped picking the straw from Gimlis' red beard nevertheless.

As they turned to the two observers afterwards, the elf still hadn't quite succeeded in suppressing his grin.

"What's all this good for?!" asked Gandalf in exasperation. "Don't tell me you have been fooling around while I've been waiting for you almost a whole century!"

The two stood stock-still until the wizard motioned them to tell their story. Gimli lowered at the elf in silence before he turned to Aragorn.

"Well, your horse is the one to blame for this delay, my friend! You should teach it a few manners! It tried to kill me!"

"What's that supposed to mean?" Aragorn asked in surprise, raising an eyebrow in question. "Something wrong with Brego?"

Legolas chuckled silently, earning himself a blow from the dwarfs' elbow.

"Let me explain..", the elf offered then nevertheless, his eyes sparkling with amusement.

"Gimli's food entangled himself in Bregos' cord. As he took a step then he pulled on the cord and your horse thought that someone wanted to go for a ride. Well, Gimli tumbled and Brego dragged him around for a while. I had to cut him loose."

"You had to cut Brego loose?" This was getting even more confusing.

"No, it was Gimli I had to cut loose. He just didn't want to hold still." At the thought of this the elf burst into light laughter once again. It was just too comical.

Gimli bristled at Legolas' version of the story, his eyes narrowing to mere slits. Elves always altered the truth until it was convenient for them, didn't they?!

"Well, I've been dragged throughout the stables after all and this blasted elf could do nothing but laughing at me!! Why should I've been trusting him that he wanted to cut me loose for real and not tangling me up further!! You never know with these elves, they are always trying to raise their exhilaration after all!!"

"Forgive me, my friend. I just haven't seen anyone dealing with a horse thus clumsily before."

Gandalf rolled his eyes and sighed in defeat; those two never got along more than a _few_ _minutes_ ere the next argument broke loose.

Aragorn was just amused about the two unlikely friends as he was used to the constant bantering that went on and on (and on and on). Well, he would miss them dearly.

How on earth should he be able to accustom to such peaceful silence again??

A pity that they had to leave so soon, but he was very well aware that Legolas had to meet his father.

"Say, my friend. I'm able to understand the departure of Gandalf and Legolas, but don't you want to stay a little while longer? I would be glad if you stayed and helped me rebuild the city, your skills could be very useful!"

For a moment Gimli just stood and considered, then he gave his human friend a wide grin.

"Well, why not? This city needs a better stone-gate anyway. I hope you have some caves here, do you?"

Elessar smiled and nodded, joyous that at least one friend stayed with him a little longer and he ordered immediately that the dwarfs' belongings were taken from Legolas' horse again.

He then bid farewell to Gandalf, who whished him good luck with rebuilding the city and reminded him once again to be careful with the library.

After that he turned to his elven companion, giving him a warrior-embrace.

"I wish I could accompany you to Mirkwood", he said with a sigh, "I haven't been there for a very long time"

Legolas offered his human friend a reassuring smile, hoping that this would make his departure a little easier for his friend.

"You're welcome my friend whenever you decide to visit, but at the moment your own folk needs your attention."

Aragorn nodded with a thoughtful expression, taking a deep breath.

"You're right as always, but I promise I will travel to Mirkwood as soon as the city is rebuild and Gondor is flourishing once again."

"Then we won't see each other for a few centuries", the elf stated with a mischievous glint in his eyes.

Aragorn chuckled, squeezing the shoulder of the fair elf in gratitude for his humour. "Well, you might be right. We have to plan another meeting then. Will you come to my wedding?"

"Of course, I will as long as my duties aren't getting in my way."

The thought of duties made them silent for a while as they both knew that much work was waiting for them.

A sigh.

"I hope time will be passing quickly then." It didn't seem right to part from his best friend, but it was true, they both had some duties to carry out.

Sapphire eyes sparkled with melancholy as the elf mounted his horse, patting the neck of the uncomplaining beast.

"Are you ready, Legolas?" asked Gandalf then, but didn't wait for a response as he steered his horse towards the gate.

Legolas paused a little longer, eyeing his human friend one last time, then shifting his eyes to the dwarf.

A fond smile graced his lips as he eyed the small being; not able to tease him in these sad minutes of departure. "Farewell, Gimli Gloinsson", he simply said then with a sincere voice.

"Sure, I'll see you when I see you, blasted elf", came the gruffly reply but the suspicious clearing of his throat gave himself away.

"Mára mesta, Estel. Take care of you." Then he spurred on his horse without waiting for an answer, lifting a hand in silent greeting.

"No diriel! Calo anor na ven, Legolas Thranduillion!" called the king of Gondor with a step forward as he watched his friend riding down the stoned pathway.

Both remaining companions stared after him, but the elf didn't look back once and soon he was gone behind a corner.

After a while even the sound of hooves silenced and they returned back into the palace.

                       

* * *

I have forced myself to keep my gaze straight forward, although my heart was longing to take one last glance at my friends.

As the temptation to look back increased even further, I urged on my horse so that we would reach the gate as fast as possible.

Soon we were on the fields and I felt the ache of goodbye in my heart. Suddenly I doubted that returning to Mirkwood was such a good idea. How would it be to come home after so many years?

Was it the right decision to leave?

Did I really have to leave so soon? Why hurry up to come home when I haven't been there for so many years already? No, no, no.. I shouldn't think something like that.

Didn't I crave to be among my own kind? Didn't I wish to wander beneath the great trees of Mirkwood again?

By the Valar, I felt torn. On the one hand my heart ached to be parted from my friends and on the other hand I desperately yearned for my homeland.

My father would be looking forward to my return as well as I could at least attend to my duties when I was back home again.

He would be disciplining me hard though and therefore I didn't want to add to his anger by delaying my arrival.

I wondered what my punishment for joining the fellowship without his consent would be? After all I always performed my tasks with assiduity, therefore giving me further tasks wasn't an option to discipline me.

Well, it didn't matter to him that I was a credit to Mirkwood; being praised as one of the most skilled archers throughout Middle-Earth.

Even being the one that threw the ring into the depths of Mount Doom wouldn't have been enough to allay my father's anger.

Well, I suppose he will be proud of me too, that was out of question, but pride had never been a problem in my family.

In his eyes I had neglected my duties and for this I would pay. My father was a strict person and an even more authoritative ruler.

At his side I learned to be fearless as he was short-tempered and fierce, but I loved him nevertheless. He made me and my brother to hard-wearing warriors.

My father wasn't really able to show affection openly, but we sensed it in every gesture. To be able to qualify for a mission or lead a troop was his way to show affection. Besides we had free access to the armoury.

The lines between love, glory and loyalty were blurred for him as he was a warrior with heart and soul himself. For him defending your home was the best way to show love.

Maybe he would have remembered _true_ love if my mother had been still with us.

I don't know.

I slackened the strains, allowing Arod to choose his own pace as I leaned back and enjoyed the wind in my hair. And for the first time since the beginning of the ring-war I felt free again.

It was the same freedom I'd felt at my ride beneath Mirkwood's trees.

The whispering of the wood reached my ears and I listened to their tales. It seemed that they were also aware that the dark Lord was gone and they breathed in with me; every other sorrow forgotten for a moment.

Their green leaves danced in the wind along with my hair and I stretched my arms like their boughs did.

As I looked up into the sky a second later I spotted Gwaihir who had come to accompany Gandalf; sailing gently above our heads.

No matter how much I loved being on a horse, to be able to fly like an eagle must be even better. It was certainly unimaginably beautiful to sail in the air like a ship on the ocean.

The sea. I was enthralled from its rich colour; from the soothing song of the waves; the sparkling of the sun on its surface.

Within seconds I was serious again. Many times I have been warned of the magic of the ocean, but I fell for it hopelessly nevertheless.

Of course I loved the woods more than anything but I had lost a part of my heart to the blue depths of the sea.

My wish to explore the sea with Gimli must be kept secret from my father as he had always made sure that I'd never forget to avoid the sea.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Shadowfax fastened his step and as I turned to face Gandalf he smiled at me softly.

"I was thinking about Mirkwood a little while ago. How's your brother doing? He must be grown up quite a lot since I've last seen him. Is he coming with you to the wedding?"

I remembered my younger brother as he had been pulling at the wizards mantle in awe. He must have been about 500 then. 'Aye', I thought to myself, 'he had grown quite a lot.'

Magic had been the most fascinating thing for him then, but nowadays he was more amazed by medicine.

"Well", I retorted then with a smile, "I hope so as he's a skilled healer and I want him to meet Estel."

"I'm sure your father will let him go as soon as he feels the effects of your brothers' enthusiasm. Lairion always had a talent to sway your fathers' decisions."

My eyes darkened as I recalled my fathers' reaction as Lairion told him he wanted to become a healer. He had always wanted both of his sons to become honourable warriors. Wasn't a healer quite as respectable?

Well, my father didn't think so, but until now I had always been there to defend my brother against him so I just hoped that Lairion wasn't angry that I left without saying goodbye.

-.-.-.-.-.-

When we reached the point our journey took two different paths, Gandalf lifted a hand in greeting. "Send your father my regards, will you?"

I nodded slightly, steering my horse to the right. "Farewell, Gandalf. We will see each other at the wedding."

We both turned our attention back to the road in front of us and without any warning the first small raindrops wetted the ground below us.

* * *

                       

Later that day Aragorn felt a slight dizziness; his head throbbing with pain.

He wasn't used to order around so many servants. Why asking a servant to do the work while he himself was able to do it as well? It was ridiculous.

In private he missed Legolas already as he had always been the one that kept the overview over the ongoings and informed him about every little detail.

Therefore he was glad that Arwen was doing everything in her power to assist him.

In some way or other Gimli was also a big help as he showed him how to order the servants around to get him a freshly filled goblet of wine or some proper meal.

Well, it wasn't easy to be king, was it? He had a lot of work to do and the city had to be rebuild also.

So many questions were troubling his mind, demanding for an answer.

Would it be alright to let the soldiers help at the rebuilding?

Should he himself supervise the construction?

If it were up to him, he'd do the rebuilding all by himself and supervising the construction wouldn't be a problem anymore either.

But_ that_ was also the exact reason why his legs hurt now as he had tried to be at two places at the same time.

He dropped onto the upholstered chair behind his desk, sighing in exhaustion.

Actually he should talk with the quarrymen about how many stones would be needed to rebuild the city, but he couldn't quite bring himself to do that.

On his desk a stack of papers was already piling up and he knew he had to look through this pile to find the sheet with the list for the wedding.

A lot of preparations had to be done.

Food was needed.

Invitations had to be written.

He also had to set up new commercial agreements, especially the ones with the elven realms.

Another sigh escaped his mouth and he buried his face in his palms.

By the Valar, he hadn't expected that he had to look through so much paper!

If the stack was piling up at such a fast rate he didn't know if he'd be even finished at the end of the year!

Maybe he should delay his wedding a little bit? He wasn't able to enjoy such a feast with so much thoughts about work in his head anyway.

Besides, he didn't want to celebrate his wedding in a city that was still a ruin. Dancing between debris sure wasn't an omen for success.

Aragorn Elessar, king of Gondor, stifled a yawn and rubbed his eyes wearily.

Well, he sure wasn't the only one forced to attend to such a boring task. Maybe Legolas had to cope with such a paper-warfare at home as well.

But if he wanted to marry his beloved as fast as possible it was necessary to take care of this annoyingly high stack of paper as he had to boost Gondors' economy first.

Suddenly a comical thought crossed his mind and he chuckled silently to himself as he could very well imagine his elven friend slicing the papers into pieces with his twin-knives.

That would be a convenient way to solve the problem, wouldn't it?

With a much lighter mood than a few minutes ago he addressed himself to the task of sorting through the papers; a smile still lingering on his lips.

**End second chapter**

* * *

_No diriel_- Be watchful

_Calo anor na ven_- May the sun shine on your road

_Mára mesta_- Farewell

(translations: Arwen-Undomiel com)

**A/N: Well, guys.. I guess.. this chapter was quite calm and unsatisfying as well, wasn't it? Actually it's just a gap-filler once again, therefore I thought that maybe I could make up for it by posting the third chapter along with it? (looking hopeful) :-)**


	3. Shattered

**Disclaimer: **Still not mine. (sigh)

**Warning: **Some violence in this chapter! And Character death, too!

**A/N:** My apologies for every mistake I wasn't able to find; I tried my best. :-)

                       

* * *

**3. Shattered**

* * *

It had taken me two days to reach the borders of my home although it seemed to me as if it had only been a few minutes. I hadn't made any unnecessary long rests as I was just to fraught with anticipation to finally set foot onto the soft forest soil again.

Arod had been taking me here as fast as he had been able to, not even complaining once. Maybe he was just as eager to meet up with the elves?

I didn't know but I promised him nevertheless that he would get the best treatment in the elven realm that was Mirkwood.

My journey had been peaceful and any other traveller had crossed my way. I was quite surprised at that fact but I didn't want to be distracted when I was alone with nature anyway.

The leaves of the trees danced in the wind, rustling silently in the progress and singing a song to welcome me home. My heart was laughing with joy and I finally felt like a true elf again; humming along with them.

The air was damp; full of invisible water and I could almost smell the life of the wood hidden in every colour.

Mushrooms breathed in and out in rhythm with the moss comfortably bedded on tree-roots. Petite flowers whispered to the bees; luring the hard-working insects to taste the sweet nectar of their blossoms.

Now that I was finally here I decided to let Arod ride a little more slow as I wanted to take in all the beautiful wonders that were my home. The wood had suffered greatly under the shadow of the dark lord and I was glad to see it flourish once again.

After a while I could make out two tall figures in a tree and as soon as they caught sight of me too they bowed slightly in greeting.

Well, we weren't quite as noble as the elves of Lothlorien and our city wasn't luminous with lights, but Eryn Lasgalen and its inhabitants were precious in their own way.

"Welcome home,prince Legolas", it sounded from all around me and smiling I lifted a hand in greeting towards the guards hidden in the trees thick canopies.

Suddenly my attention directed itself onto another thing. I had almost reached the palace now and the closer I got the more the songs of the trees changed.

I strained my ears to figure out why, but my senses just didn't want to comprehend the meaning of it.

Once again I urged on my horse and didn't stop until I was at the entrance of the massive mountain. The palace itself that was built in the mountains' cave was completely made out of wood and its roof was a tangle of thousands of roots.

I was so occupied with worry about the heavy silence that I didn't even pay attention to the feeling of the soft ground beneath my feet as I dismounted my horse, although I had sworn myself to enjoy it.

Immediately there was a servant hurrying up to me; bowing deeply with downcast eyes as soon as he had reached me.

He started talking, but although I could hear his voice I wasn't able to understand the meaning of his words. Right at the moment I wouldn't have understood anything as I had trained my eyes on the palace; not knowing why I felt this uneasiness.

Suddenly he took the reigns out of my hand and as I didn't protest he lead away the horse I had promised some special treatment.

I remained standing there; staring.

Something was wrong.

A strange feeling stirred in the pit of my stomach and caused a shiver to run down my spine.

The wood also didn't sing as it should. It didn't sing its usual song anymore.

Sadness. Why were the trees singing about sadness?

Something was _definitely_ not right.

The doors to the hall were open wide and the colourful gems sparkled brightly as the light shone in. The leaves underneath my feet that covered the ground of the palace rustled silently as I rushed in.

My sharp eyes roamed around, ready to take in even the smallest detail as my concern mounted into unbearable heights.

I heard my own breathing in my ears; it sounded loud and ragged.

My head already knew the reason of my uneasiness, but something within me resisted vehemently to receive the same conclusion.

Then I caught sight of something else..

The light-coloured wood of the pillars were perforated with small holes that hadn't been there the last time.

Holes.

Deep, perfidious, little holes.

I furrowed my brows as my heart didn't want to follow the same path of logic my brain had chosen.

Frustrated about my blockade and the uneasiness within me I forced my heart into the frightening cold realisation that was feeling so wrong.

Then it crashed down on me like a Nazgul in a nose dive and everything started spinning in front of my eyes as my knees threatened to give in.

My breathing got out of hand and I wheezed like a dying animal.

I could hear my own heartbeat thrumming in my ears like an army of trolls; threatening and rushing in panic.

"No...", I whispered silently to myself, finally starting to truly realise and _accept_ the meaning of all of this. But it couldn't be true; it couldn't.., could it?

The room seemed to sway as I examined the perforated pillars more accurately. It was like an invisible force. I couldn't stop absorbing every little detail although I already knew what had happened here.

I _knew_.

I knew and I wondered if this knowledge was now trying to kill me.

There was only **one **way how such holes could arise: the arrows of orcs.

I felt strangely reminded of the war as I heard the wood whisper to me and I briefly listened in to the tale it told me. War. Misery. **Death.**

Time froze as my world caved in around me painfully.

I had been thinking that they were safe.

All the years I been thinking that my loved ones were _safe_. All the years in which I had placed my services so desperately at the disposal of the human race, I had failed to defend my own home.

How could I have been so blind?

Had I really thought that this place would be spared?

Had I _really _believed that Sauron wouldn't be interested in destroying the elven realms? The elves **still **were one of the strongest force of Middle-Earth and they were persistent adversaries to Mordor.

No, this hall had suffered more than just a common attack of the orcs to annihilate us; it had been a part of a war.

By the Valar.. how could I've been so blind..?

Delicate yet strong arms wrapped around my chest as my knees protested and I was shaken out of my reverie quite ruggedly.

"My prince! Are you alright? Maybe you want to take a seat?" asked a female voice. I stared at her with wide, unblinking eyes.

Then I just shook my head weakly and squeezed the shoulder of the servant gently for a second, pushing her away as I headed towards the throne room.

My father. I had to see my father.

I balled my hands into fist in the intend to crush my fear that my father had fallen during the orc attack. I had to know it. There was no time to drown in fear. I had to know if my father was still alive.

More determined than ever I strode towards the large double doors while the leaves flew up around me due to my hurry.

I could smell the faint trace of blood.

Trembling hands closed around wooden door handles in the shape of leaves and after a deep breath full of hesitation I opened the mighty doors of the throne room and stepped in.

...

For a while I just stood there and examined the gorgeous appearance of my father, whose words silenced instantly at my arrival.

As soon as he laid eyes upon me, recognition dawned on his face and he dismissed the servant he had been speaking to with an impatient hand-gesture.

The haggard-looking servant hastened out of the hall; closing the doors behind him.

After that it was completely silent.

Nobody dared to say a word.

I stared into his steel-grey eyes and he stared into mine. I searched these emotionless pools of grey for answers, but he granted me none.

There was nothing; nothing but silence.

I couldn't tell if he was angry or surprised.

I couldn't tell if he was my father or my king.

Then I stepped forward only halting at the steps right in front of him.

I knelt down, tilting my head in obsequiousness as I decided that today he was my king.

"I return home with glory", I heard my own voice say that sounded so foreign to my ears all of a sudden.

Silence.

It was a silence that took your breath away; that could break your neck as soon as you turned your back on it.

I lifted my eyes carefully, examining him as he sat in the cradle of a tree that was his throne.

His left hand rested upon a bough while the other held a wooden staff the colour of santal that was decorated with beautiful carvings.

"Ada?" I asked uncertainly; afraid of his silence.

Suddenly I remembered a gesture of human warriors to pay respect to their king and I took my bow; presenting it to him in my open palms so that he had been easily able to take it if that had been his wish.

He rose and immediately I lowered my gaze again, looking at his bare feet instead.

Such humbleness was quite unusual for a prince; son of a king; but after I had joined the fellowship and gone to war without his consent; I realised that now I wasn't more than a mere subject.

My father sat down again and I could feel hundreds of thoughts going through his mind; a few of them quite frightening.

"It's good to see you, my son", he said with an emotionless voice and his usual stoic expression. "Stand up."

I did as I was ordered and when he kept silent I took this as permission to speak.

So many question burned on my soul, but suddenly.. I couldn't find any words.

I sighed; trying to order my thoughts.

"What happened?" I asked then, finding nothing better (and more obvious) to ask.

My question echoed alarmingly uncertain through the large throne room; causing my uneasiness to mount again. I couldn't remember that my fathers' halls had ever been that silent before.

"Well, I think that's a quite extensive question, don't you think?" came his calm response, his eyes never leaving my face.

I furrowed my brows and frowned at him. His behaviour was truly irritating and I couldn't quite shake off the feeling that he was keeping something secret from me.

I tried to elaborate, "I feared for your well-being as I stepped into the palace."

He brushed off my concern with a simple gesture of his hand.

It was the same kind of gesture he had used with the servant. "There's no need for you to fear for me."

"I did nevertheless as I found the wood of our home perforated with arrows!" I insisted louder this time, my agitation clearly showing on my face now.

My father only smiled. "Well, you have noticed then?!"

His statement was dripping with sarcasm and as he stood once again, a small wave of fear rose in my chest.

Will he arrest me?

Will he call for some guards to take me down into the dungeons? Was my betrayal of trust to him really that severe?

Would he ask for my death?

No, wait.

This was my _father_.

By the Valar! I have been fighting in the war of the ring and now I'm already trembling with fear when my father was standing in front of me?! '_A_ _great warrior I am indeed!' _I thought with a snort.

Suddenly there echoed a sound through the hall that nearly ripped my ear-drums as he slapped me hard.

I didn't move; not even lifting a hand to touch my burning, aching cheek.

"What did you expect?!" my father bellowed into my unblinking face, "Did you expect to come home after all these years, noticing with joy that our home had been spared by the troops of Sauron?!"

A snort.

"Well if that was what you had expected, you're truly a fool" he spat; looking at me in disdain.

Well, I didn't know what I expected.

I just couldn't say and therefore I stood motionless; trying to be as silent as possible.

"I had barely gotten the message that you had set off with the fellowship as numerous spiders along with troops of orcs attacked our homeland" my father told me.

He must have seen the horror on my face 'cause he just arched an eyebrow as he looked down on me.

"Don't tell me that this surprised you", he said coldly, shook his head and took a few steps to the side.

"Although your brother did his best, he wasn't able to command my troops like you and so our home was at the mercy of this **filthy**, malicious creatures. We sustained many losses and everyday it was **harder and harder **to defend our folk against the orcs. I decided to take the weak ones to our secret asylum as it wasn't safe to stay here anymore. My troops were sent out to kill the orcs and spiders ere they would be able to reach the borders of the city. I think that had been a good decision, wouldn't you agree?"

My father paced a few steps back again; averting his eyes. "_Unfortunately _we hadn't anticipated such an aggressive onslaught and the orcs even made it into the palace."

My breath hitched and inwardly pleaded for him to go on, but he was silent for a while; gazing off into the distance.

Suddenly he turned again, a strange smile on his lips. "Fortunately though our foes retreated again as in these hours of misery the one ring had been destroyed; otherwise we would have been dead. It's quite ironic **my son**, don't you think? Although you had abandoned us years ago you have been part of our rescue nevertheless."

My lungs burned with devastating fire and I didn't dare anymore to raise my eyes as guilt burdened my heart.

I was frightened that I would collapse under the accusing gaze of my father; somehow ashamed of myself.

"Goheno nin, Ada.."

He eyed me from head to toe, now turning towards me again.

"I'm glad you agree with me that joining the fellowship had been a mistake, but there's much more you'll be sorry for. At first though, I want to tell you that I'm glad you're back."

Somehow I could do nothing more but stare at him in shock.

My father stepped to the small side table next to his throne and poured some wine into two silver goblets. He gave one to me then, he himself lifting his own goblet.

"Let's raise our glasses to your return" he announced, his eyes sparkling with pride.

I stopped him with my fingers gripping his dark-green cloak ere he could start one of his speeches about elven prestige; now frowning at him in sorrow.

"What is it I will be sorry for, Ada..?"

His hesitation caused another storm to rage within me and he pressed his lips together until they were nothing more but a thin, white line.

He then offered me a sad smile that was indeed able to shatter my heart.

"You have to attend to your duties as a prince and warrior more than ever, ion-nin, and not only because you still have to kill the remaining orc-troops within our borders for me."

The thought about orcs and another row of battles caused all energy to leave my body.

Here I stood, thinking about peace in the hope to never attend a battle again as my dream about freedom shattered into pieces.

Something in me was broken; I felt torched.

Peace was an illusion, wasn't it?

It would never descend upon Middle-Earth.

But why hadn't my father called for help? Why didn't he ask for assistance of the other elven realms? I asked myself why he hadn't sent for me. I would have come. Certainly.

"Why..", I asked quietly, "Why didn't you send a message to tell me that our folk was suffering?"

"You had already decided, Legolas. You had already joined the fellowship of the ring. It wouldn't have been honourable for me to ask for my son's help because I wasn't able to defend our home."

"**Honour!?** " I exclaimed. "Why do you care about **honour **when our folk is suffering?? You should have known that I'd come! Maybe even the elves of Lothlorien would have come! That's our home, Ada!! I would have come if you hadn't been to proud to ask!!"

Another slap awakened the ache in my cheek anew; silencing my anger just as fast as it had come.

Well, it seemed that this topic was closed.

"The loss I had to suffer **because of you** was just too great, so don't open your mouth without thinking first!! It seems that being around humans and _dwarves_ hasn't done you any good!! Do you even know what you're saying?! You'll never be able to imagine how hard we suffered while you had been away defending the homes of other people!!"

His slap had been hard, but his words were even harder. This was a nightmare.

But he was right I would never now how much my folk had suffered. I had been away; watching the misery of other people, but I had been blind to the misery of my own kind.

I raised my eyes, studying my fathers face.

"Tell me about the loss you had to suffer. Tell me what I've to do. What shall I take care of? I will do everything to make up for my absence."

Another snort; his eyes became hard.

"No, Legolas, you will never able to make up for my loss. _You_ don't even _realise_ the whole extent of your betrayal" he said then with a voice so cold it could freeze Mount Doom.

Why?

I frowned at him, noticing the lines of sorrow in his face.

Something was wrong. This was a nightmare.

"Your brother has fallen."

"No..." I breathed, my denial sparkling in my eyes like stars on a pitch-black horizon; I stumbled back.

"Lairon commanded one of my strongest troops in your place. He left for the caves, intending to kill the orcs that were threatening our home."

My throat felt dry. I couldn't say a word.

My fingers dug at my chest; the spot where my heart was beating underneath. – Where it had been beating.

My father didn't care about my pain as he continued, "I found his lifeless, mutilated body at our borders. The rest of the warriors hadn't been found. Maybe they served as food for the trolls, I can't tell. It was...as if.. they had known that he was my son. Maybe.. they had?"

Stop. He should stop speaking. Please, someone should stop him from speaking.

My breath didn't return to me.

Everything within me was trained on the pain in my chest.

A wheeze in my lungs as I tried to breath in.

Forgotten was the fear about fighting more battles.

Forgotten were the abuse and the aching words.

The face of my father swayed in front of my eyes and for the first time I felt like vomiting.

Was this how dying felt?

My body was cold although I thought my clothes were scorching my skin.

My fathers' lips moved, but I could neither hear the words nor was I able to understand them.

Nothing reached my usually sensitive ears not even my own heartbeat anymore.

And in the next moment a silent darkness descended upon me.

**End third chapter**

* * *

_Ada_ – father

_Goheno nin_ – Forgive me

_ion-nin_ – my son

**A/N: Hmmm.. kind of cliffie, huh? :-) I hope you enjoyed this chapter; please tell me what you think. Well, guys.. see you next week!**


	4. Silent tears

**Disclaimer: **Still not mine.

**Warning: **Some depression as always.

**A/N: **My apologies for the long wait. I know that I promised to post this chapter a week ago, but.. I simply wasn't able to. I didn't feel very well last week (I still don't). One of the reasons why I hit rock-bottom is that I discovered that some chapters of this story got lost. (My old computer was slowly but surely breathing its last a few months ago and I got a new one, maybe that's how it happened.) :( I swear I would have set to work as soon as I discovered that a few chapters were gone, but I had to stand in for a few ill workmates at the restaurant I'm working for and also get done my exercises for school. I'm _really_ sorry and I promise to work as hard as possible, but it might take a little while to rewrite the lost chapters. So.. there's the possibility that maybe I can't get a chapter done in time for my weekly post, but otherwise I want to cling to posting every week. Ummm.. well.. this chapter is rather depressing due to my mood. I hope you won't be mad at me for missing possible mistakes.. and once again: Thank you for all of your reviews!

**Kimsa Ki-Lurria:** I'm very glad that you liked the last chapter since I was afraid you would be bored by it and the fact that I succeeded in creating some suspense is very, very pleasing. :) I'm sorry though that there had been so many mistakes in my last chapters.. I'll try to cram a little bit more English grammar. :) Thank you!

**Zellycat: **Thank you very, very much for your kind reviews! At first I thought that maybe the Thranduil-Legolas scene couldn't quite express the feelings of the characters but I'm greatly relieved that apparently I was wrong. :)

**Special thanks to:**

**Nessa Leralonde: **I can't even tell you how much I appreciate your help! I'm entirely grateful for you pointing out my mistakes and offering some suggestions. And no, you haven't offended me at all as your suggestions were absolutely fittingly and I was glad you allowed me to use them. :) I.. umm.. well, I don't know what to say anymore.. I just wanted to say thank you.. for your help and for sacrificing some time for reading and correcting my work.. AND.. for your very kind reviews of course..! :) Maybe.. you want to become my very appreciated, official beta-reader for this story..? Pretty please with a cherry on top..? :) **smiling nervously**

* * *

**4. Silent tears**

* * *

Aragorn sank down on the large bed with a sigh; hoisting his tired legs onto the soft mattress.

He just laid still for a while; staring at the crimson canopy of the bed.

The day had been long; too long. His eyes ached from reading and his head thrummed as if a dwarf was pounding it with his axe.

Each day he had to prove his abilities as a king and righteous ruler to lead Gondor back into light again.

How could he rebuild the destroyed villages in the province with such limited resources? He didn't know, but he had to find a way rather quickly as the inhabitants of the villages had no home till then.

Concerning the collapsed trade how should he be able to obtain the implements for the villager that were simply indispensable to life?

This was all too much.

He turned to the right, looking into the azure blue eyes of his love.

"Are you well, meleth?" she asked softly, eyeing him with concern.

The human just nodded slightly and kissed the forehead of his beloved.

"There are just a few thoughts circling in my head over and over again. I don't know where to keep the sorrows when I'm finally able to go to bed."

Sighing he shook his head, closing his tired grey eyes for a moment. He wished for his elven friend to be here with him.

Legolas certainly would know what to do; he always did. Sometimes he thought that nothing, simply **nothing** was capable to unsettle his elven friend.

Another sigh escaped his mouth.

"Let go of your sorrow, Estel. All will turn to good account in due time, I'm certain of that" whispered his future wife, caressing his face with one delicate finger. "You have time; _we_ have time. Sleep now and grant your mind and body some rest so you can be the righteous ruler I know you are tomorrow once again.."

A nod was the only answer she got from the mighty but completely exhausted king of Gondor before he slowly drifted to sleep and Arwen smiled gently.

"I know you will find a way to lead your people back into light again.. I simply know.."

* * *

_Holes in the wood; a hole in my heart. Pitch black holes._

_I looked into the face of an blond elf. He would have been beautiful if it weren't for the two pitch black holes right where his eyes should have been._

_The dead ones have no eyes._

_I shuddered at the sight of it. They stared at me._

_His gaze was accusingly; I could tell that it was although his sockets were empty._

"_Can't you see the holes?" he asked me with a dull voice. I flinched and he took a step forward reaching out for me. _

"_Something was found at the borders of Mirkwood", he said, "a corpse."_

_His cold, ashen hand gripped my shoulder and it felt as if my life was drained out of me._

"_The corpse was barely recognisable", he told me, stepping forward once again. "It had been abandoned. Maybe it was already decaying."_

_Our faces were now mere inches apart. No breath tingled my skin. I could do nothing but stare into the endless pitch black depths of the empty sockets. They seemed to suck my soul out of my body._

_Then he leaned forward and as his lips touched my ear there was no warmth._

_A coldness spread in my body; sending shivers up and down my back. _

_A cold hand squeezed my heart; trying to crush it._

_I was freezing._

_Suffocating._

"_The corpse had been me..", he whispered._

I woke with a start; drenched in cold sweat and for a while I just sat in my bed panting. This was nothing like the dreams I were used to.

This was a nightmare.

My heart ached and I absently rubbed my chest where it was beating under. I could hear some birds chirping outside, but it sounded odd and cheerless to me.

The silken sheets of my bed were unbearable on my skin as my skin felt raw and tender.

The smell of crackling fire and wood in my chambers burned in my nose and my mouth was dry.

Desert had found its way into my mind.

My eyes were dry although I had thought tears would never stop falling after the devastating news I had been given.

My thoughts were dull.

Lifting my heavy feet from the bed to stand up wasn't an easy task and as I finally stood I was exhausted and breathing hard.

Some unknown part within me cursed the Valar for punishing me with such a fate.

Didn't I deserve some peace, too? Had my part in the fellowship been of such insignificance so that the Valar didn't want to grant me some freedom?

I didn't know. I didn't know anything anymore.

I just wanted to rest. Rest seemed like a good option. Rest was good.

But there was someone who didn't want me to rest. No, this someone wanted me to lead; to fight; ..to die..?

A soft sigh escaped my mouth as I dressed, strapping my weapons to my back. Some things couldn't be changed and one of these things was my father's will.

Ada wanted me to fight and fighting I would.

I would defend Mirkwood; for me and for my brother.

Lairon had fallen because I hadn't been able to defend our home. He had sacrificed his life to carry out my duty.

I owed him that Mirkwood would be once again light and peaceful. I owed him to carry out our father's will in his place as he had done it for me.

But as I took my first step, my legs crumpled beneath me and without any grace I slumped to the floor.

I felt unbelievingly weak. Was it Mandos' voice I had heard in my dreams?

Would he even want someone like me in his halls? By the Valar.. I couldn't go.. I couldn't confront my brother.. not yet; not before I hadn't done everything in my power to defend the home he had died for.

My eyes lifted and suddenly I found myself looking at my own wretched reflection in the large mirror in one corner of the room.

For a moment I didn't recognise myself as those blue eyes staring back at me were dull and blank.

Once gleaming blond hair now framed the exhausted looking face like boughs of a weeping willow; pale as a weak sun-ray in winter.

I still couldn't believe that my brother was dead.

I hadn't even said goodbye to him.

_A son, _said a voice in my head.

It scorched, it burned; it stubbed it hurt..

_A brother, _whispered the voice.

_A mutilated corpse at the borders of Mirkwood_.

A lone tear trickled down my cheek, feeling hot and cold at the same time. I didn't know whether it was burning or freezing my skin.

A second later I tasted the salt on my lips and I remembered the sea with it's salty water and the song of the waves.

Then I raised my head and started to sing.

There's grief

there's loss

there's hopelessness

the wind stops dancing

the trees don't whisper

as I stand here mourning for you

Forever I will miss your soul

as it was connected with my own

But trust me one day

we will meet again

in life

in death

in nothingness

always and forever alone

(Lament for Lairion; written by Chavakiah)

* * *

My fingers traced the fine writing on the wooden plate; fingering the smooth surface.

The writing had been carved with great accuracy and care but I still was the opinion that this hadn't been enough.

Again and again I traced the fine curves of the writing; surveying them with uttermost pedantry.

I breathed in deep, letting the smell of rain-wet leaves penetrating my soul, mesmerising this moment.

Then I opened my eyes again and touched the rough bark of the tree in front of me that told me with every gust of wind a part of its life.

This was the tree my father had planted for my brother at his day of birth one thousand and a few hundred years ago. The tree that was planted in honour of Lairon had a wooden plate with my brother's date of birth as well as the date of his death carved in it.

I felt commiseration for this beech as it had often talked with my brother and now it would whisper its words in the wind without my brother; the one these words were meant for; hearing it.

Next to the beech there was another, higher, one with boughs reaching for the sky while the leaves sang songs of my kind.

I took my time and settled at his roots; feeling an exhaustion that wouldn't cease with any rest.

My soul started taking in the sounds of the tree's song without fail and I joined in as my memories replayed in front of my eyes once again.

In exchange to the information about the rest of the world the beech granted me a small insight of the happenings the time I had been away.

I allowed the tree to entrance me with its rustling leaves to let go of my sorrows for a while.

We had a close relationship to the trees that were planted at our birthday as they accompanied us a part of our span of life and we paid homage to them as if they were our brothers.

They were our connection to those beloved ones that had left our side.

In the past I had often visited the kind oak that could tell me precious almost magical memories of a graceful, loving elf maiden whose inner light shone so bright that it attracted the attention of a proud warrior.

It was the tale of my mother who had attracted my father like a well-spring attracted a thirsty animal and she had given him the inner peace he had been so desperately looking after.

She had sung her oak songs about love, valour, and about contentedness, sharing her joy about her two sons.

This oak was one of my most precious friends as it shared its memories with me when I found myself not able anymore to remember the elf that was my mother.

With a heavy heart I started my walk down to the clearing where my mother's tree stood.

It was my duty to tell the oak that one of the sons had joined my mother in the halls of Mandos.

It was my duty to amend the story.

It was my duty to tell that a life had ended.

* * *

**End fourth chapter**

* * *

**A/N: **Well.. umm... another rather boring chapter..? **hiding behind something very biiig and steely**


End file.
